Thursday 26 January 2012

I lost Myself-ReVamp

Just came across it and I have to say it touched my heart so much...sad yet beautiful....

Wednesday 25 January 2012

Yanındayım....

Hayat bir sınav derlerdi eskiden
Ama cevaplar yerine soruları aradım hep
Doğru ile yanlış var mıydı?
Gerçek sadece rüyalarda mı yaşardı?

Saatler günler
Günlerse aylar oldu
Her gün gözümü açtığım yeni bir kabus
Her ay ise omzumda taşıdığım hapsedilmiş gözyaşlarıydı

Kimseye duyuramadığım umutsuz haykırışlarım
Günler çoğaldıkça
Etrafımdaki gri duvarlarda yankılanan
Sessiz çığlıklara dönüştü

Her biri kırılp düştü yere
Narin ama aynı zamanda keskin
Zamanla, o çok iyi bildiğim...
Korkunun ıssız tadıyla bütünleşti

Korku arttıkça
Kör gözlerden gelen
Biraz acıma,biraz da küçümsemeyle dolu
Boş bakışlar çoğaldı...

Kimse görmüyor mu?
Cam kırıklarının yazdığı son soruyu
Sen ?....
Oysa ki cevabı kolaydı
O da 'yanındayım' demendi.....

Remembering....

Recently I have been thinking about how time passes by so quickly and yet I seem to stay at the same spot throughout every minute ticking along and how I just stand there counting the seconds as they pass me by...But then I remembered how time used to feel like an eternity,how seconds  were minutes and minutes were hours...each one was to be savoured for every new day shining upon me was another opportunity for discovering,researching,inventing,imagining and enjoying....As childhood memories wrapped themselves around my thoughts,I asked myself,what changed?,Whats the reason to this 'emptiness'?,is this 'growing up'?.....I used to think that meant I could stay up until late hours,it meant that I could buy and eat as many sweets as I wanted,it meant I would be tall,it meant I could drive a car,it meant I could go on the big rollercoaster rides,it meant I could wear makeup and high heels....it meant.....freedom.But then i guess,freedom meant responsibility and with that came stress which changed my interpretation of time.There was too much to do and yet too little time.Every new day became another chain to the same routine,slowly building an iron rope around my neck.By time I got used to it and like a puppet,I followed the same routine,the same acts controlled by social norms and rules.But putting everything aside,I wasnt lonely,isnt this how we all feel from time to time? like every today is a reenactment of yesterday? But it doesnt have to be.What we should all see is that we have forgotten how to 'imagine' and 'dream'.I realised that the lack these two terms were the emptiness,they were the abilities that I had as a child which made time 'worthwhile' and that time, was my 'forgotten eternity'.So, in the end I think we should take childeren as an example and dream,imagine,think,reflect and finally do (which was the freedom we lacked as a child) in order to create change and actually make use of the time we have. We should 'remember'......



Sunday 15 January 2012

Beyaz Yalanlar

Karanlığın soğuk pençesinde
Tutsak kalmış umutlar
Acının ısıttığı güneşte
Asılı kalmış anılar

Soluk gözyaşlarının ardına gizlenmiş
Canlı korkular
Dudaklarımın arasındaki boşlukta
Kaybolmuş heceler

Aldığım her nefeste yankılanan
Suskun sesler
Hepsinin ortasında kalmış
Sonu daha yazılmamış bir masal yaşar

Anlatamadığım o unutulmuş hikaye
Dinlemediğin o masum nağme
Gösteremediğim sonsuz sözcükler
Göremediğin boşluğa uzanan virgüller

Onları görmek yerine
Noktalarla doldurdun başlangıcı
Daha başından inkar ettin gerçekleri
Anlamak istemedin dediklerimi

Gözlerimin içine baksaydın
Belki anlardın.....
Ama saniyeler çoğaldıkça
Sen geciktin.....

Artık toprak kırmızıyla beslendi
Üstünü beyaz yalanların süsledi....


Friday 13 January 2012

Insanity=Overdose Of Poignant Emotions

I just noticed how we use the word 'insanity' so often .....but I think in a way we are actually abusing its real meaning while doing so because usually we seem to use it in a wrong way.So,what is the definition of Insanity? According to the dictionary,it is a mental illness or derangement.Dementia, lunacy, madness, craziness, mania, aberration.....as the synonyms go on.....However I dont agree completely with this statement.To me insanity is the overdose of poignant emotions and not knowing how to deal with these... Since we are all human and we all experience intense emotions such as pain,burden,happiness,excitement,love,jealousy,anger,hate,fear,even emptiness......then arent we all somewhat insane? The only line that divides us into being 'normal' or being 'insane' is the ability to be aware of,embrace and enshroud those powerfull feelings.Because being concious of what we are actually feeling behind those emotions leads to an understandment of ourselves,then this will lead to realising that 'fighting' them, 'ignoring',' denying' or simply giving into them wont help at all,what can help us is loving ourselves,accepting our emotions,accepting ourselves for who we are...accepting both good and bad.And finally not forgetting that we are not alone with these emotions that we cannot control,everybody goes through them at some point of their life...After all,we can only know what the light feels like when we have felt the dark.



Saturday 7 January 2012

Silentium-Unbroken

Beautiful....Especially love the lyrics :)

Wednesday 4 January 2012

To Bid You Farewell...

Walking along an empty path
Every step I take is gilded by decayed roses
Their petals swept away by the winds of betrayal
Chanting away our grim fate....

I still remember your promises
Now turned into ashes burning under the cracks in my heart
And here you are asking me if you can glue them back together
Honey...dont you know whats already broken cannot be mended ?

The truth is I will never be whole again
Because you were my other half
But I guess the one I saw as true..wasnt you
It was  your facade of lies....

Im here for the last time
So please,just listen to my tears
They will sing you hymns of a forgotten tale
They will whisper you these chains of lost poems that I hung behind my pain
They are here....
To finally bid you farewell....,